So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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