I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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