you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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