i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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