Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
