I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
