Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
