I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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