i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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