I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
