a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Randomize
