no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
