Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
