You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
