The maid of honor just puked.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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