He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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