I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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