we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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