Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
