i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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