My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Randomize
