i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
our cab driver is having phone sex.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
