Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize