East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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