Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
