I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
