Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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