Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
