I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
