OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
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