happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
