She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
