Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
