what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
