The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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