office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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