He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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