Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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