evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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