I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
worst night to have a conscience
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
