1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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