Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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