I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize