Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
