Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Randomize