love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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