As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
