Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers

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(858): View more from California

Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.

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(361): View more from Texas

Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?

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(513): View more from Ohio

Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?

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(651): View more from Minnesota

She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.

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(954): View more from Florida

I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.

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(206): View more from Washington

we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.

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