i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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