would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
