I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
