chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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